“Can’t make it across the pond to explore the English countryside and visit local pubs?” asks Marie Callender’s website. “Never fear: Our Pub Style Steak and Ale meal brings classic pub fare to you.”

“Warm up with hearty beef, golden potatoes, carrots, and a rich brown ale gravy packed into a flaky, buttery crust.”

Gosh. Sure sounds like homemade. So who’d ever guess that the hearty beef is “cooked beef and water binder product” (beef, water, modified food starch, salt, and natural flavorings)? Or that the gravy has some two dozen ingredients (including carrageenan, corn starch, beef tallow, beef extract, lactic acid, and methylcellulose)?

What with all the heavy cream, butter, and beef, Marie manages to squeeze 790 calories and 29 grams (1½ days’ worth) of saturated fat into each 3-inch-wide “meal.” Oh yeah. You also get a pile of white flour and half a day’s sodium (1,210 milligrams).

It’s like eating a McDonald’s Cheeseburger slathered with a quarter cup of lard...except that would hit “only” 720 mg of sodium.

“The Marie Callender’s story” is all about “a heritage of homemade,” says the company’s website.

Yes, indeed. Who doesn’t yearn for some homemade cooked beef and water binder product?

mariecallendersmeals.com—(800) 595-7010